The 80's Songtext
von Robbie Williams

I smoked consulates and park drive, drank Nookie Brown, learned how to skive
Polo mints to hide my breath from my mum, did a little weed ′cause it felt like fun
Did a little speed if my friend had some, Nicked Volkswagen badges, I'm a Beastie Boys son
Me so horny, me so young, and I still get my washing done

Auntie Jo died of cancer, God didn′t have an answer
Rhythm was a dancer, any room for a chancer
That's me in the corner, thanks sir (thank sir)
Wore a troop tracksuit, British knight shoes, Kangol hat like L.L. Cools

Before I was having it, having it large, they nicked the B.M.X. from out of my garage
Knew it was tier from off the estate, 'cause every time he sees me, he smiled like we were mates
Then on in, I′d have to walk to me Nan′s, and I'll dream my dreams through a sea of prams
Like a hooligan on the football stands, and I throw the V′s to Leeds and West Ham

Then I ran, I ran so far away, down Scotia Road to a taxi bay
Then I ran again 'cause I couldn′t pay
Young Muslim didn't get his fare that day
I apologise today

Things look better when they start
That′s how the 80's broke my heart


And who are you calling 'poof′? You like wham man, I hate that stuff
And then my Granddad died, and left a hole in the family
And lots of women had to nanny me, school was a laugh, they didn′t have A.D.D
Thick was the term they used for me (over and over) repeatedly, (over and over)

Take my breath away (take my breath away)
Pass the bidley, bidley, bidley, bidley bong (pass the bidley, bidley, bidley, bidley bong)
Pass it on the left-hand side, right turn, Clyde
That girl in the fourth year got pregnant, and she was raised Catholic, brilliant

I cried, she cried, we cried, her youth died, drank cider in the cemetery
The year above us had discovered 'E′, and I said it weren't for me
12 pounds 50, I could rob me mum′s purse and buy one off chalky
Met a girl on Monday, drank fizzy pop on Tuesday, fingered her on Wednesday
And on Thursday and Friday, and on Saturday, dumped by Sunday

Things look better when they start
That's how the 80′s broke my heart

The wonder years I've played my part
That's how the 80′s broke my heart

Like I said, I lost my virginity to a girl called Anne-Marie
Well, she said she fancied me, and then she said "fuck me" and I thought fuck me
I′m all talk, and it'll be over too quickly, and it was, but I couldn′t care less
I'd seen a girl′s part, made a mess on her dress, oh, yes, you're now rocking with the best


Second person in my year that had seen a breast, I′m in my 30s now, and I'm still impressed
Why the Falklands, Mum, and what have they done?
Where do girls come from, where do girls come from, where do girls come from?
It's the 80′s, what you looking at, you mong?

So young, so long, so young
So long, too short, so long
What you looking at, you mong?
Too short, so long, too short, so long, so long