“Serious Fan Mail” Songtext
von Frank Zappa

We released a single from the album Ruben and The Jets—a song called Deseri.
And it made the Top 40, it became #39 on KIOA in Des Moines, Iowa
But only because the label says "Ruben & The Jets," not "The Mothers Of Invention
The disc jockey there had never heard of The Mothers Of Invention
But he thought that Ruben and The Jets was a great new group
And we recently played in Philadelphia and a disc jockey in that city had explained to me that they had played the record
He knew who The Mothers were, but they had never announced that, uh
Ruben & The Jets was actually The Mothers. They had always been announcing the single under the name of Ruben & The Jets
They′ve been receiving SERIOUS FAN MAIL at that radio station
Piles of which I have stashed in my suitcase, saying things like
"Ruben & The Jets is the greatest group since, "Uh, what was it? "Danny And The Juniors."
Makes you feel real good

Well, you know what happened when the first pressings of this record was sent out to radio stations
It didn't say "Mothers Of Invention" on it, it said "Ruben & The Jets."
There was no mention of the group. And that′s probably why the record got played in the first place
It was only the second batch of pressings that had any credit to The Mothers Of Invention on the single
You see, when we send records to radio stations, especially radio stations in the South and Southwest
We sometimes receive them back. Chopped up. We've received several albums from radio stations in
That area—they chop them up with a hatchet and put 'em in an envelope and send ′em back


That′s for real?

Yep

Can't believe it
Well... You know how they are

Well, I don′t think that my intent is to be 100% radical all the time—We made Ruben & The Jets because
I really love rhythm & blues. I like that kind of music. And I always wanted to make an album of it, you know
Ever since I was in high school. So, there it is!


In fact, an interesting anecdote might be inserted here about the time the album was sent to the program director
At radio station KRLA in Los Angeles
Uh, he received a copy of the album which of course mentions the name "Mothers Of Invention" on it in small print
So he didn't— Uh, he wasn′t fooled the way the other radio stations were fooled into playing our record
So, he knew that it was The Mothers Of Invention and therefore just put the album aside completely, you know
Didn't even bother to listen to it. Until one night he was at home and he got drunk. And he decided
"What the heck, I′ll play this thing and get these guys off my back."
So he put it on the record player and heard that it was 1950s LOVE MUSIC
Woke his wife up and they danced all night to it, and he called the office the next day raving
You know, it affects the—he was about 29 years old—affects that age group very strongly
Because they can remember that era, and have a lot of, uh, glandular-tinged nostalgia for that sort of music
You say "they." Is that part of your era too?
Oh, of course! I happen to like the Ruben & The Jets album very much
I, uh— And I like that type of music and we're cutting another Ruben & The Jets album next week
At Criteria Studios in Miami. We'll be sitting around there for a few days before we work a job in Miami
So we booked the studio and we′re going in and record the songs in the same manner that they were recorded in the 50s
The Ruben & The Jets album was recorded in a very contemporary way
Sort of track by track and very carefully stereo′d out and— uh everything very organized
In the olden days they used to dump you into a room and stick a microphone somewhere
In there and after a few hours of moving people around the room to get the proper balance
They would come up with a nice old-time rhythm & blues record. We're going to use more than one microphone at this next
Recording session but we do hope to record the band just all sitting around in the room and we′re probably gonna make up
Some of the songs in the studio. Because after all boy-girl situations are timeless

Well, I didn't make conscious imitations of vocal group styles but there are certain cliché elements that were directly lifted like, uh—
There′s part of the fade out from "Earth Angel" superimposed on part of The Rite Of Spring in one of those things
And, uh— I think that the best harmonizing group from the old days was The Moonglows
They really had it down. But that wouldn't be one of my favourite groups because they were so sharp, you know
So precise that it was almost like they were unreal. You know? I went for groups that really sang out of tune
And really cried, like "Valarie" by Jackie & The Starlites is a real good one