Ja, Schatz! English translation
von Bodo Wartke

Our love already lasts eternal
And since our wedding, being single has ended
Now we live in the same house
I see you day in, day out
And I ask myself, God have mercy on me
How do I get out of this?

I don't love her anymore
She treats me like dirt
In the past I loved nothing more than her, now I only want to get away
She only complains and tortures me into misery
Doesn't matter what I do, she does not find it good
She is a real dragon
A mean and a perfidious one
I have to end this, but I still always say

Yes dear! Of course you are right
Yes dear! Yes I know this was bad
Yes dear! No I do not want to argue
Yes dear! I am deeply sorry


This cannot be, I mean to say no and say yes
This always was my problem, even then, in front of the altar
The devil should come get her
She will put me in my grave
But a friend has recommended to me
Man! Come on and cut it off
Exactly! The idea is genius
Just wait, wife! (literally: woman)

If you torment me again with your sharp tongue
I will cut it off - with the axe
Even if you feel remorse
Too late! I'll get the axe
This was the last time you dare to rant
Because: I have a hatchet
I want that you cower and cry
When I am in front of you
With the axe

Because you constantly tear on my nerves
With the axe, because you annoy me with empty phrases
With the axe, because you chase away all of my friends
Because the axe is the only thing that still helps, if you ask me


I am currently imagining
That I am cutting off your ear
Just kidding, what am I saying
I am cutting both off
I am swinging, with a good mood
My axe and I am singing
When me, with my blade
Am penetrating your throat
I'm cutting a gap through the trachea and esophagus
Sever muscle strands while I listen softly
How nice, in your neck
Your bones crack
But enough talking
Action awaits

I'm going to the hardware store and am searching with consideration
An axe for my wife and am waiting for the night

I'm sneaking into her bedroom
There she lays, deeply asleep
On her bed, as always
And slumbers quiet and good
The wind blows the curtains and I'm happy:
Soon it will happen

Then she says with a sleepy expression
"Close the door! It's cold"

Yes dear! I will close the door
Yes dear! Right now dear, then you'll have your peace
Yes dear! I also closed the window
Yes dear? I'm already going. Good night!

Oh well, who cares?
I'll just cut wood