1-900 Songtext
von Larry the Cable Guy

Call me now for a fun time!

Do you want to meet a girl like me over the phone?
Then text me and let the fun begin
If you really do text me, then you′re a big freaking loser


If you think women as hot as me are really home on a weekend
Waiting for some freaking perverted loser like you to call us
You need to shoot yourself in the head because you're a moron

Let me tell you, if there′s a woman that looks like me and I'm single
And sitting at home on a weekend waiting for some fat poop-stained
Short loser to call, I'm either 350 pounds or else I have a penis

Get real, guys. If you fall for this commercial
You need to be put in a rubber room!