Seltzer Boy Songtext
von Allan Sherman

Seltzer boy
Where are you hiding?
If you don′t come right now
I'm gonna tell your boss on you

Don′t bring me water

I'd rather have seltzer
'Cause water don′t bubble
And water don′t fizz
Water, I hate it
'Cause it ain′t carbonated
But a glass of seltzer
On the other hand is


Don't bring me Pepsi
Don′t bring me a Kool-Aid
Don't bring me a malted
And don′t bring me champagne
I'll tell you what, boy
Bring me one Scotch and soda
Then you'll take back the Scotch, boy
And leave the two cents plain

Seltzer boy
When are you coming?
If you don′t bring that seltzer
I′m gonna tell Mr. Meltzer on you

Seltzer boy