Dentist! Songtext
von Alan Menken

When I was young and just a bad little kid
My mama noticed funny things I did
Like shootin′ puppies with a B.B. gun
I'd poison guppies, and when I was done
I′d find a pussy cat and bash in its head
That's when my mama said (what did she say?)
She said "My boy, I think someday
You'll find a way to make your natural tendencies pay"

You′ll be a dentist (be a dentist)
You have a talent for causing things pain (pain)
Son, be a dentist (son, be a dentist)
People will pay you to be inhumane (inhumane)
Your temperament′s wrong for the priesthood
And teaching would suit you still less
Son, be a dentist, you'll be a success


Here he is, girls, the leader of the plaque
Watch him suck up that gas, oh my God
He′s a dentist, and he'll never ever be any good
Who wants their teeth done by the Marquis De Sade?
Oh, that hurts, wait, I′m not numb
Oh, shut up, open wide, here I come

I am your dentist (dentist, goodness gracious)
And I enjoy the career that I picked (ooh)
I am your dentist (dentist, fitting braces)
And I get off on the pain I inflict (ooh, really love it)
When I start extracting those molars (ooh, don't try it)
You girls will be screaming like "holy rollers" (ooh, ah, dentist)

And though it may ′cause my patients distress (distress)
Somewhere, somewhere in heaven above me
I know that my mama's proud of me
'Cause I′m a dentist and a success

Say "ah!" (Ah!)
Say "ah!" (Ah!)
Say "ah!" (Ah!)
Now spit!