Pointy-Haired Boss Songtext
von Three Weird Sisters

Pointy-haired boss hires you as the qualified pro
Pays a salary for all you know
And then countermands your suggestions
Pointy-haired boss orders pizza to trap you at work
And then toddles off home like a jerk
Leaving you with the indigestion

Pointy-haired boss claims in verbiage omniscient
That the cube is efficient
Use of workspace and oh so cozy
Pointy-haired boss times your breaks and your lunches
Promotes morons on hunches
Stresses out and then plays things

Oh, pointy-haired boss
Must be good to be king


Pointy-haired boss likes to throw in a buzzword or two
Loves "proactive" and "paradigm" (ooh!)
But don′t ask for a definition
Pointy-haired boss wants the volume on speakerphones loud
Conducts business on cell phones in crowds
And steals taxis with no contrition

Pointy-haired boss has a problem with time off
Your pneumonia's a small cough
Here′s a tissue, just keep on working
Pointy-haired boss undercuts her own granny
Backstabs and kicks your fanny
All the way to the bank

Thank you, pointy-haired boss
We'll bend over, you spank

Pointy-haired boss doesn't actually know what you do
Yet feels confident writing reviews
That will impact career decisions
Pointy-haired boss thinks technology is really great
The computer is a paperweight
That plays solitaire with precision


Pointy-haired boss dangles raises like carrots
Without reason or merit
Issues meaningless memoranda
Pointy-haired boss goes on junket vacations
Offers lame explanations
Of why nepotism′s okay

Hey there, pointy-haired boss
We′ll just do what you say

We won't do what you do
We won′t ever, no way
Become pawns, scum like you
When we make our big bucks
And your karma kicks in
And you're down on your luck
And you′re balding and thin
We'll remember your fame
And we will cross the road
As you go up in flames

You will serve us, you toad