Psycho Mambo Songtext
von Ruth Wallis

Oh, I was just
Psychoanalyzed
And they found out
That it really was the nuts
I was standing on the brink
I had a funny kink
At night instead
Of counting sheep
I was counting me


I had the handsomest
Psychiatrist
He was daring
He was charming
He was tall
He had a lovely
Blue divan
He was every
Inch a man
And didn′t hurt a bit
As I recall

He turned the lights
Down low
And then he asked me
Questions
And I gave him
All the answers
And even
Some suggestions
He probed
For my subconscious
But he didn't find it
He said: "Tell me
What you thinking?"
I said: "Let′s go out
And get stinking"


He said: "Madam"
I wonder how he meant that
"You've got a psychosis
And neurosis might set in quick"
He said: "You're standing on the verge
Of the ultimate urge"
I said: "Doctor, you mean I′m sick?"
He said: "You′ve got a split personality
Split personality, split personality"
I had to think about that one
I said: "If it's split then you did it
Cuz it was good as new
When I came in here"
He said: "You must learn
To love everybody, love everybody"
I said: "I got a sister like that
Her case comes up next week"

Oh, he played
Some sexy music
He asked about
My old flames
I said: "One was short
And one was long
I can′t remember names"
It all began, dear doctor
When I was a freshman
At old PU
In the yearbook
They voted me
"The girl most likely to"
And I did

I fell for a musician
It went from bad to worse
He was only good for
Two choruses
And one verse
And then came that inventor
With his wonderful remedies
He invented
The most terrific cure
Now he's looking
For the disease

The next time I got married
To a guy who practiced law
I found out
On our wedding night
He needed
To practice some more
I said: "Doctor, doctor
Help me if you can"
He said: "You don′t need a doctor
What you need is a man"
I said: "Well..."

I was just
Psychoanalyzed
And now I really
Know the score
Twenty-five consultations
Each one better
Than the one before

I had mambo
Mambo, mambo
Way down
Below my combo
I had tully-ully-dully
Of the toes
I had schizophrenia
Monomania
Even Pennsylvania
And it cost me
A hell of a lot of dough

Oh, I was just
Psychoanalyzed
Now I don't know
If I′m glad that I did
Since I got
The treatment of brother
I don't know one couch
From another
I'm a crazy
Here′s where I get the pains
Mixed-up
Hurts me here, kid