Ballad of Charles Whitman Songtext
von Kinky Friedman

He was sittin′ up there for more than an hour
Way up there on the Texas tower
Shootin' from the 27th floor, hey
He didn′t choke or slash or slit them
Not our Charles Joseph Whitman
He won't be an architect no more

Got up that mornin' calm and cool
He picked up his guns and walked to school
All the while he smiled so sweetly
Then he blew their minds completely
They never seen an Eagle Scout so cruel

Now, won′t you think of the shame and degradation
For the school′s administration
To put on such a bold and brassy show
The chancellor cried, "It's adolescent
And of course, it′s most unpleasant
But I gotta admit it's a lovely way to go"


There was a rumor about a tumor
Nestled at the base of his brain
He was sittin′ up there with his .36 Magnum
Laughin' wildly as he bagged them
Who are we to say the boy′s insane?

Now Charlie was awful disappointed
Else he thought he was anointed
To do a deed so lowdown and so mean
The students looked up from their classes
Had to stop and rub their glasses
Who'd believe he's once been a marine?

Now Charlie made the honor roll with ease
Most all of his grades was A′s and B′s
Real hip snortin' trigger squeezer
Charlie proved a big crowd pleaser
Though he had been known to make a couple of C′s

Some were dyin', some were weepin′
Some were studyin', some were sleepin′
Some were shoutin', "Texas number one"
Some were runnin', some were fallin′
Some were screamin′, some were bawlin'
Some thought the revolution had begun


The doctors tore his poor brain down
But not a snitch of illness could be found
Most folks couldn′t figure just a why he did it
And then the good would not admit it
There's still a lot of eagle scouts around

There was a rumor about a tumor
Nestled at the base of his brain
He was sittin′ up there with his .36 Magnum
Laughin' wildly as he bagged them
Who are we to say the boy′s in-
Who are we to say the boy's in-
Who are we to say the boy's insane?