Bedtime Stories Songtext
von Judge Dread

Cor, Christ, I had a skinful last night
What′ve we got first? Bedtime stories?
That'll be nice and quiet
Right lads, ready?
Cor, Jesus
Cor, what?

I was kneeling by the bed and praying
She said, "Come, love, and get undressed"
I said, "I′m praying for guidance"
She said, "Pray for strength and I'll do the rest"

So I told her a bedtime story
About the first time I got laid
As I ran down the stairs, she cried after me
"You bleeder, you ain't paid"


As a young man I couldn′t get many girls
Because of the size of my wood
I had to keep my shirt on
And give them as much as I could

So I told her a bedtime story
Of my non-religious rod
And how I was an unbeliever
She said, "You don′t believe in oh God"

So I'll tell you a bedtime story
One night I was asleep
And the girl said, "Get up quickly
I can hear the stairs creak"
She said, "Get up, it′s my husband"
And I was halfway out the door
When I realised, it couldn't be
I was married to her, dior