my nervousness Songtext
von ducksmithson

I′m terrified to leave my bedroom for a weekend
What if I see other people
And they say they like my smile?
Now I'm sitting in my kitchen
Trying to give myself permission
Not to kill my inner demons
Just to take them on a walk for half an hour
I′d do most things for half an hour

I gotta leave at 9:05 in the morning
Or else I might be too early
Or else I might be too late
I gotta eat a balanced breakfast
So I can pay good attention
So I eat as fast as I can
I don't care cause I'll feel nauseous either way
I might feel nauseous either way


One foot after the other
It′s like this for every day of the week
My jaw, my gut, my terrible dreams
My nervousness and me

I′m pretty sure I qualify for medication
Cause this shit's debilitating
But I′m shit at taking pills
What if I take one tomorrow
And It doesn't swallow down right
And It closes up my windpipe
And I faint and split my forehead on the tile?
That might deter me for a while

One foot after the other
I have to talk to myself like a kid
Take each day as I beg for release
My nervousness and me

I′m getting tired of all this shaking in my insides
Didn't gain any new insights
I couldn′t gain the last ten times
I think it's not a lesson
Or some divine intervention
It's just my body never sits right
And I think all of my problems are just mine


My nervousness and me
Might deter me for a while

One foot after the other
I hate talking to myself