Jort Storm Songtext
von Slimecicle

This′ just in
We're receiving reports that a new fad is taking the nation by storm
Its name? Jorts

But it appears as if this
Breakthrough in jean-short splicing technology
Is causing irregular weather patterns all across the globe

It′s the warmer season so I can't wear jeans
I really like the denim, but not the length of the seam
My mom dresses cas' and my dad likes to preen
I′m not like either of them
I got the recessive gene

Jort Storm!
Jort storm′s comin' tonight
A Jort Storm!
It′s a category five
Jort Storm!
Jort storm's comin′ tonight
I said a jort storm's coming, better run and hide


Jorticane
Jortnado
Jortnami
Jortquake
Jortruption
Jortalanche
Jortpocalypse

The jort storm′s comin' (Jorts!)
So you better start runnin'
Fast, it′s a chase
But be careful ′cause these jorts will chafe you, yeah

They're the new sensation (Jorts!)
Wear ′em to every occasion
Jorts in the pool
Oh, even better, wear 'em to a funeral, yeah (Jorts!)
My personality is ninety-nine percent jorts
I got a genetic test, but all my genes were shorts!

Jort Storm!
Jort storm′s comin' tonight
A Jort Storm!
It′s a category five
Jort Storm!
Jort storm's comin' tonight
I take off my fucking jorts, I got a jort inside


Breaking news
Millions of Americans are being sucked directly into the jortex
And it′s headed straight for this studio
To my wife Cheryl, and son Timmy
I love y- ah! (Jorts!)
The elders foretold
Of a fashion so bold

A new god of the Earth (Jort-thulhu)
Seal it in denim and turn it into Jearth