Here's to the Amicable Songtext
von Nada UV

I mispronounced us faithfully
Going down hard with my best shirt on
You′re pouring our future into coffee —
Slow, then fast, then gone
Who knew "amicable" comes flavored like burnt toast in November
Or that love can go from a magic potion
To a life-preserver to a coat you wear twice a year

Outsmarted my heart with your lawyer's diction
Your smile so brutally civil (polite)
We′re factual tonight, seasoned cynics —
Conquering the medical, clinical (I learned how to be logical)
Dragging suitcases, zippered history
You packed my favorite insult
Split the rent at world's end, I
'll wire you half the apocalypse (get you back with interest)


Let′s call this defeated friendship
Mile through the cringe of kindness
You′re velvet cruelty, I'm bourbon sap
Blindness is our stock in trade (blindness)
Truth split like a bar tab or a cab —
Who the hell ordered hope?
When forgiveness is just bureaucracy
Hey, wanna go out back for a smoke?
(that′s not a euphemism, asshole)

We fizzled gracefully
Like champagne on a windowsill
Our last embrace — tax-deductible
As cold as split Ulysses pills
You said "let's be grownups,"
Artful contraceptive condescension
Grafted neat onto childhood wounds
Can′t decide if the cat misses you
Or if he's just tired of my tunes

You′re faking allergies, I'm faking eligies
Both faking "fine"
Our final fuck — a study in contracted contradiction
"love" on a deadline
Even guilt's gone vegan
Nothing fatty, nothing fried
(You can say I wounded you, but you can never say I lied)


Let′s call this defeated friendship
Smile through the cringe of kindness
You′re velvet cruelty, I'm bourbon sap
Blindness is our stock in trade
Three sides to every story —
Who the hell ordered snacks?
When forgiveness is just bureaucracy
You wanna cover up your tracks

I′m applying for grace, citing "irreconcilable quirks"
Your favorite vice — quitting people
I'm just another stack of paperwork
What′s the harm in loving thin? A calorie-free win-win
You said we were "different animals,"
I said "I defend your right to pretend"

You kept my playlist, deleted the pictures
Swapped my birthday for a drummer joke
I recycled your promises, composted faith
Took bitterness to soak (I'm all she wrote)
I almost wrote you a letter
But the punchline got lost
Even iron irony wears out
Losing structural integrity (counting costs)

So, to us — whatever we are now
Two clever fools doing the work (doing the work)
You dodged the crash, I missed the warning
We both got what we deserved (what we deserved)
Here′s to the amicable wounds
Bleeding out somewhere free and legal (yeah yeah yeah)
I'll see you in the reruns, and fuck
I'll probably laugh at this too (I′m a different sort of seagull)

The other day
Well, really, it was two or three years ago
I saw a seagull attempting to take flight
With an entire pizza in its beak
And it looked at me and said
"Baby, you′ll get through this."