Third Rock From Her Thumb Songtext
von Cledus T. Judd

Don′t tell her what it's worth
Third rock from her thumb!

Well, he walks in the pawn shop, one thing on his mind
Wants to buy a diamond but he doesn′t have a dime
He finds the one he likes and they cut him quite a deal
A two carat solitaire but neither one's real
Picks up the payphone, puts it to his ear
Calls his chick collect and says, "Get over here!"

When he shows his girlfriend, she can't believe her eyes
She never thought she′d ever really get one that size
He tries to think of something when
She asked him, "Where′d you get it?"
Down at Diffy's Pawn, but he never will admit it
He tries to change the subject, forget the wedding list
Let′s head on out to Vegas and get it over with


Flaws and defects, no brilliance
Hope she never finds out how much he spent
Nothing else shines like a zirconium
Don't tell her what it′s worth
Third rock from her thumb

Just outside of Vegas, the truck gets a flat
She said, "We would've made if you weren′t so doggone fat"
They try to hitch a ride from some hippies in a van
To a ratty little motel called the S&M Grand
Puts on her big ol' nightie, gives him a little wink
Ring slips off her finger down the bathroom sink

She starts to call a plumber, he begins to shout
"Give me a coat hanger, I think I can get it out!"
Fishes out the ring in a big ball of hair
Slips it on her finger as he pats her derriere
Thinking to himself, it's a lucky thing
A plumber would′ve cost me a lot more than that ring


Flaws and defects, no brilliance
Hope she never finds out how much he spent
Nothing else shines like a zirconium
Don′t tell her what it's worth
Third rock from her thumb
Flaws and defects, no brilliance
Hope she never finds out how much I spent
Nothing else shines like a zirconium
Don′t tell her what it's worth
Third rock from her thumb
Wonder what it′s worth
Third rock from her thumb
Don't tell him what it′s worth
Third rock from her thumb