High School Party (Girl) Songtext
von Bo Burnham

High school party, senior year
Boys and girls are all sippin′ on beer
I like soda, where's the soda?
Am I the only fucking person here that likes soda?
I see you from across the crowd
I said the party is bumpin′ and the music is loud
You're really drunk and you're lookin′ sad
It′s like a date rape ad

Girl, then we start to dance and
Girl, baby this is romance
Girl, I'm startin′ to grow down below
Shit, why did I wear sweat pants?
Girl, your body's like what
Conjunction junction, that′s a fine ass butt
I'm like a cashew in a lollipop
Just keeping suckin′ till you get to the nut


And I said let's rob an Asian kitchen, or stroll down the block
Either way girl, we're taking a walk (wok), nothing?
You′re gonna love me the way my uncle did
Except you′re not gonna to go to court for doin' it
Be a guillotine or my girl instead
Either way, you′re givin' me head
I′m gonna love you, baby, the right way
Shorty with a body looking hotty when I say

Girl
When I say girl

We go into the bedroom exchanging nervous laughter
Why's it called dry humping if I always need a towel after
You spread your naked legs and I see that wound that never healed
Even though you′re yellin' for me, I can tell your lips are sealed
We're both aware of my erection, you ask if I have protection
I say "Uh well no I tried to buy ′em once
I was in the convenient store my old babysitter walked in
I had to hide them near the TIc-Tacs
I was so embarrassed I peed myself a little bit"

Girl
Girl


Insert a euphemism
A sexy mental prism
Increase my pelvic rhythm
For you with my syllogism
I know your body and I know how to please you
Don′t thank me, thank Wikipedia
Guys don't go down, well I am
What the fuck is that, I should have brought my diagram
Ooh did you feel that, that was an educated guess
Ooh did you feel that, uh that one was a sneeze, my bad

High school party, senior year
None of that happened ′cause I wasn't invited, hm